Raise Your Hand if You Agree!

I shamelessly stole this, but only because I love it so much. I plan to follow this advice very soon. On October 11, to be exact.

Too Awesome

If you're interested in Legos or libraries, you have to check out these pics of Lego libraries and bookstores. They are great. I love the chicken-suited story time librarian and the Half Price Books replica.

Here's more about the first library featured. It is a brilliant creation!

Variety is the Spice of Life; or, Sad but True

I varied the routine this week by visiting Walmart on Friday night instead of Saturday night. I'm sorry to say that this change passes for excitement in my life.

Lego Librarian

Bet you didn't know there's a Lego minfigure modeled after me!

Yes, It's Purple

Ophelia wasn't my direct inspiration,  but I admire her forward sense of style. I'm not sure why this caught my fancy,  but it did.

Holiday Eating Tips

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Holiday spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door, where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. It's rare.. You cannot find it any other time of year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-alcoholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it. Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy. Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Holiday party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple, Pumpkin, Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost. I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Re-read tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner. Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate and wine in one hand, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

A Day in the Life

Librarians are nothing if not civic minded. Here's what I did at work on Constitution Day:

Who Knew?

I just read the first few items I posted over six years ago. Some make me cringe, but I think it would be fun to read back over everything--I've never done that. One of my first posts was, interestingly, a bit of foreshadowing: What's an Agar Plate?

I was reading Emerging Infectious Diseases then (I'm sure I Googled something or used a library database to find that one article) and now I'm reading an epidemiology textbook to prepare for the first semester of public health classes!

Stay Off the Road!

Turning on the TV, A Technical Manual

Six year old A might have a future as a technical writer. Do you agree? Take a look at her written notes for how to turn on my TV and adjust the volume (while Auntie is still asleep in the morning). I think she describes the process quite clearly.

Transcription:

Both Red Butens.

[Diagram of Red Buttons labeled "FRST" has been crossed out]

Last: +button for loud, -button for soft

[volume controls are on the MAGNAVOX remote]

WATE FOR THE GREEN [BAR] TO COVER THE WIT [WIDTH] [OF THE] TV -------------

Squashed

If you carry a hard-boiled egg in your tote bag, it may end up like this:

(sorry for the unfocused photo--I'm lucky I even got the pic off my phone)

Soaked

A, after 30 minutes at the Discovery Center's Water Works exhibit.

Priorities

I love visiting in Utah with my mom and aunt (Auntie lives there, Moth visits at the same time I do).

The reasons I love this trip are plentiful, but include my aunt's arctic basement, being able to legitimately listen to all the "adult" talk and being able to ask questions (can't do that when you're an eavesdropping child), perusing the cookbook collection, and doing the crossword puzzle every day (everyone gets her own photocopy).

One of the other reasons the trip is so enjoyable is that these two women have their priorities straight. The agenda above proves my point.

I must mention that the written list is missing several things we did while I was there (root canal, burnt sugar marshmallows, sugared peanuts, See's Candies, Oquirrh Mountain Temple Open House, Sundance, Hires Big H, Rubio's) as well as a few things the other two have done since I left (Julie and Julia, bookclub, Fleming's). But the list gives you the general idea. Can't wait for next year!

Auntie K by the Numbers

Age: 37

Height: 63"

Small electric appliances in the kitchen: 10

Age at first kiss: 15 or 16

Library books at home: 21

Nephews: 1

Nieces: 4

Pets: 0

Email accounts: 5

Hours slept last night: 10

But Does it Work?

Have my knit-wise readers seen KnitPicks dye it yourself sock blanks?

For you non-knitters, the explanation is that self-striping yarns are popular in some knitting circles: the yarn is dyed in such a manner that when you knit it into socks or another item, stripes or patterns magically appear (see the example at left).

The sock blanks are machine knit blank swatches, so you paint your stripes on the swatch and then, without even unraveling the swatch, knit from it to make your socks.

If it works, I think it would be a lot of fun.

Since I've never knit a pair of socks, and in fact have still not finished Baby Jack's Christmas stocking, I probably should not attempt this right now.
Photo by: Hello Lovely

Bizarro Auntie K

Remember Bizarro Jerry? While I was "running" at the track last week and thinking about what an unnatural act that is for my body, I started to wonder about Bizarro Auntie K. Here's what I think she's like:

Tall and willowy
An early riser
Doesn't own a watch or a calendar
A great volleyball player
A healthfood nut
Tone deaf
She finishes EVERYthing she starts

A Quiz

Here's the question currently posed on the whiteboard by the office back door. So you tell me--

What's Your Favorite Christmas Goodie?

Recommendation

Feeling stressed out? Need some soothing background music to play while you try to dig out from under the paper pile in your office? Want a break from "Sleigh Ride" and "Silver Bells"?

This original music is guaranteed to solve these problems and more. Let the creator know what you think!

Finally, Part II

Here are a couple of photos of the library art installation: >reduce<

The pile and paper strings were constructed from library printing waste.

For more photos, visit my flickr page.

Finally - Part I

I finally have something cool going on in my library that I can blog about! Since my professional blog is, for all practical purposes, defunct, you get to read about it here instead.

We have a very nice, neat, physically appealing library. The food and drink policy allows only bottled water. There aren't many open seating areas where groups of students congregate to work together and study---they're all closed off inside group study rooms. It's relatively quiet, relatively clean, but a bit boring.

One thing we do have, however, is "free" printing. Student technology fees and the library budget enable library users to print at no additional cost. As much as they want (up to 50 pages at a time). It's a fabulous perk. And reams of used paper are left on the printers every day. We recycle, but last year, over 6,500,000 pages were printed in the library. That's a lot of paper, any way you look at it.

Enter the Student Art Alliance, who at the library's behest is doing an art installation in the atrium aimed at raising awareness of the paper we consume.

Tune back in tomorrow or Wednesday for photos of the most exciting thing that's happened in the library since I arrived (unless you count the stray dog who wandered inside during the summer or the mouse I found in our office and carried outside a couple of months ago).