Not an Unqualified Success

The semester is over (for me), and though I'm waiting for grades, I suspect (hoped) I earned a B+ in the class I took. (I actually took two classes, but one was a pass/fail and I earned a 90%).

I earned plenty of Bs and worse in college, but none in library school. This B is a combination of mediocre effort and absence of a natural affinity for the subject. My library school grades didn't always involve my best effort, but library school is pretty easy, and there was perhaps some natural talent involved.

One remedy for my lingering unease is to say, "I'll try harder next time," but I've decided to sit out next semester and rethink the entire Master's of Public Health plan. So if I don't go back, I'm left with a sour taste in my mouth. I realize a B is a perfectly acceptable grade--I think it's the mediocre effort that has me feeling dissatisfied. I'm happy to be done, but wish I could also be happy I'd done a good job.

Too much self-recrimination?

Selective Memory

Why do I only remember I need new wiper blades when it's raining?

Another New Frontier

Full-length X-ray image of Dayton C. Miller.

Today saw two firsts in the usual non-adventure that is my life: First fainting episode and first CT scan. I'd prefer for today to be the last incidence of either. Actually, the CT scan was painless (assuming I don't have to pay for it). The fainting left me with a sore head and elbow and a bit of embarrassment.

I wish I'd fainted in a more glamorous and decorous situation than in the middle of a mammogram and on a tile floor, but there you are. No, I did not eat beforehand, yes, I was perhaps a bit nervous because it was a follow-up screening* and I had some other worries on my mind, and yes, I knew that I was prone to such behavior, though I've never actually fainted before.

Everyone was as nice as could be, and the silver lining was the fact that it happened where it did, so they made the CT scan and x-rayed my elbow on the spot without sending me to the emergency room. They also pushed me from room to room in a wheelchair, which was perhaps excessive, but I'm sure they were all holding their breath until I left the premises without further incident.


 *I'm going back in another six months for another screening. It's unlikely anything of concern. I may ask to sit down for the next one, as a preventative measure!


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image: Miller, E. E. (1896). Full-length X-ray image of Dayton C. Miller. Dayton C. Miller Photograph Collection. Available from American Memory at http://memory.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/h?ammem/dcm:@field%28DOCID+@lit%28dcm001748%29%29 

On the Frontier

For the past six months at church I was a counselor in the stake Primary presidency, which meant visiting different wards 2-3 times a month to train and observe their Primary organization. I missed the children in my ward, but I loved the women I worked with and I enjoyed meeting the children and leaders in other wards. In November, the church created a stake in my town, and I assumed (based on things that were said to me) I would have the same calling in the new stake (all four of us from the former presidency are in the new stake).

Well, that isn't the case. The other three women were reinstated, and I'm now the adult Sunday School teacher in my ward (Gospel Doctrine). 

Yes, after years of teaching teenagers and children, not a person under 25 is in sight anywhere. I'm happy for the opportunity to study the scriptures, but very nervous about teaching adults. With the exception of about four months of teaching Gospel Doctrine a few years ago, I've taught children and teenagers for the past eight or nine years. 

The past Sunday was my debut, and it was rocky. I prepared extensively for the lesson, but started late because I was nervous and spent far too much time on the introduction to the lesson. The former teacher was excellent (and in the room), which just increased my anxiety. I'm hoping for a better experience this week. 

My Three Pirates